Oh how time creates a substantial feeling when emotions open the door...

Even now, theres a constant fire inside. A fire inside to achieve what was once thought to be something out of reach. With constant temporary goals met, it is still only battles being won, not the war. Why? Why are we unwillingly chosen to possess such a passion that most of the time only blinds us? That allows a once violent pain, to be simply numb. That allows the mind to have run-ins with ourselves of the parallel dimension. That pushes our God given human gift known as being "artistic" to horizons not yet seen, but only to be adapted to until the next unveiling has emerged. That enables one with closed eyes to have more vision than those with the gift of sight.

Our minds are capable of more than you can even to bare to imagine. And the truth is, we will most likely never be able to witness such capabilities until we make our decent to the ultimate parallel universe. Different people believe in different destinations, some believe in no destination. I believe that we have definitely have been created by all of earths resources, and energies that circle our existences constantly, but that's exactly it.....I believe we were created. I am a strong believer in paying credit where credit is due. And it would be overwhelmingly selfish if I were to not honor my own principles when it comes to the very taken for granted subject of "life". I have not been innocent of this in the past, but I now rather choose the eyes of the closed than those with the wasted gift of open eyes. We do have a purpose, and its a purpose that does coexist with science and faith. If you have faith for a loved one to beat cancer, or to survive a heart attack or a stroke, you have definitely had an experience with faith. I have faith, that we are the ultimate design of not a being, but something far greater than what we can ever imagine.

This life is what were given to do with, at our own disposal, and with the common occurrence called death.....how you die is completely out of your hands. Even suicide, even though you make think its a choice or your own, its not, its your mind being overwhelmed by current energies that the mind decides to dwell on. It can be prevented, but still its an overtaking.....

I have lost loved ones, relatives, childhood friends, strangers....and have felt a feeling of nothing but anger. But I now realize that it is also the same feeling or pathway to feel as when a positive occurs in my favor, when the negative occurs in an others. I'm given the same existence tools that everyone else was.......

i believe.....i can feel.....i can submerge myself.....i can love....

I, Jose Guevara Morales, do not deserve what I was given, for I am a sinner and have sinned maliciously, but still am grateful and wish the glorious onto others way before myself........

Amen......

Me, or the other Me.....

Well, here I am writing again and I know its been a very long time since last post, but I've been on a roller coaster ride between then and now, as I'm sure it has been with the rest of everyone else. You can also say a lot has changed as well. One thing is that Ive been coming across a lot of multi-personality carrying people. And I don't mean like the actual diagnosis (although it probably still the case) but what I guess you can associate with people who just want to please everybody.

Like if Larry wants to go see a movie hes been waiting to see for a long time, and comes across the opportunity to see it with two different people. Person A. that watches the movie with him sees certain situations in the film as being pretty entertaining and hilarious due to actual personal experiences. Larry actually wanted to cry when witnessed to these parts of the film. Plus the film portrayal of these moments was very dramatic. Well, Larry holds back his true emotions and he even tries to laugh along with person A. Thus compromising his true self in nature.

When Larry saw the same film with person B., he noticed that there was absolutely no emotion on person B.'s face. Not sadness, compassion. Maybe a couple of smiles here and there but that is all. And though, realistically, there is nothing wrong with that, once again Larry compromised his true emotions he felt from the movie, and acted just as person B. acted.

Now imagine Larry taking on this behavior with everything else in his life. No matter what the cause or reason is, he takes this behavior on with almost any social situation. Most people would call this "not being real". But what if this behavior is actually what he gives more of a priority to? What if he decides to live his life like this and believes this is used to his advantage? Always taking a side, but never taking a side. Speaking up about things but yet being quiet when something should be said. Acting on things that didn't happen but when things do happen, not moving a muscle. Trying to please, impress, entertain, befriend everyone, but not really having your own position to stand on. Not taking sides can be a great thing, but can also be bad as well as most of you probably know by experience. I sure do.

To be cool and to have a lot to offer seems to be the mainstream, as it has been for a very long time, but when does it start to take a toll? When are main soul motivators and principles disappear? When will be the last day when any of us meet someone who is actually the person they portray themselves, physically and verbally? When can we really not be worried about the other side of the wall? When people say that they don't want to hear everything someone else has to say, or don't want to know everything that goes through someones mind, there is a reason for that. Fear. Fear that they might see, or hear something they don't want to. Will the opposite day ever come? I am not perfect, I am not calling positives or negatives, but merely pointing out something that really is ignored or recognized but not acknowledged........