Friday, June 22, 2012

Ignorance is actually happiness.....

Being in the modern world with current situations and obligations and expectations creates a feeling of heavy stone carried not just on my back, but my whole body, especially my hands, knowing that they play the biggest part in all of my mental obstacles.

All I can think of is the feeling of envy when it comes to those who occupy the state of being of relaxation and bliss. To return five years ago and to be completely ignorant to things that would develop into stressful nonsense.

To be able to wake up or fall asleep with only the thought of what's to come the next day and not what's to come the next month or even year. To be present at certain places or participate in certain activities without being reminded of mentally painful times, or times that I feel I can never have again that I wish so badly that I could. To be relieved of such animosity and hardship would result in a feeling that can only be described as simply just floating from the ground and up into the sky with nothing but positive encounters to expect on the way.

But yet, I still find myself ridiculed, plotted against, hated and many other things by the modern world I live in, but all due to the fact I deserve it all. Some will see this and simply think "shut up"......they are probably right.

All I know is, that one day, I will be ignorant enough to be in a blissful state once again....

1 comment:

  1. Sorry you feel that way. You carry your self very well and really cant tell the mental struggles your facing. Maybe you need a move? Not sure what would help your situation to be happy what your doing with out feeling so sad and stressed. Miss ya tons, always get people asking about my ink and tell them if they ever go to hawaii go to you for a tattoo.

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