As Time Does its Part....

Well, the past few weeks have definitely been quite a roller coaster and have even kept me away from the computer more than I would like to admit....but besides time, a lot of the blame has to go with my thoughts and how they made me feel. I have really had a lot on my mind and it became difficult to dodge. Then all of a sudden, I thought I was on a verge of a mental, emotional breakdown, a little blue bird showed up to my surprise, and eased my mind, and showed me to take my thoughts and problems, one at a time, even if I had to write them down. From taking care of a child being able to go to private school, to being an understanding son, trying to make the best effort I can as a people person, not disappointing my friends, and lastly but not least, using the energy and will power I have left to tap into my soul when I arrive at work to do what I know best.

Its easy to spread the mind thin, but that is where the real gauging of the parameters take place, as far as the decisions beginning. I have always found way to find the light before, no matter any situation, and especially lately due to words of others who believe I do have the latter in front of me! This is my duty and mine alone at this moment, to just keep breaking walls and paying no attention to petty obstacles and popularity games. I was right before, what goes around, comes around, so I must be as honorable, modest, and truthful as possible. Im grabbing my destiny by the horns and showing it that I make my own future, my own fate, and must have faith in myself in doing so....

A Spark...

The beginning of today looked a lot like other days....until I finally got hit with a new wave of creativity. After acting on this wave, I started to get a little stoked on what the next couple of weeks could hold. But all it took was one simple look in the mirror, and I started to realize that there are even more things I am slacking on (besides my looks). I do not hold the same conviction I used to host with me on things, even the glances I deliver.

When I was in California this past summer, or even while I was on the warped tour, I had a certain conviction of thoughts and actions, that I realized I had lost, only today I realized it. Could it also be that my biggest battle is with myself? that this whole time I'm actually keeping myself down? My best friends help me, even other friends try to diagnose, but I believe I must defeat myself before I can defeat my obstacles that stand in the way of my own personal goal and others expectations. Man this life is just crazy, if I was anyone else, they would of committed suicide, so I must be strong...

Well....

My first time using Blogger, and I have to say this is actually going to be interesting. I had a pretty good day, but a real busy past couple of weeks. I am currently working at tattoolicious here in Honolulu, Hawaii. I always struggle to do great tattoos, I'm always trying to out do myself from the last time. But it all still seems like its not good enough.

I know that getting better takes time, but I pushed myself super hard this past year, have been told that I do amazing work, but still get treated like its ok. My best friend is very good, and has a lot of admirers. It seems like right now nobody really admires my work. Maybe its time to do I did a year ago, and take myself off the map, and train once again, or maybe I shouldnt care about the lime light and just chase my skill and do my original plans, and be a hermit again, not like Im going to have a girlfriend soon, or anything of that sort. I dont know, its really hard especially when theres such high expectations of me, and then I feel like I let them down, and not even seen anymore. This sucks.....